Guest post from Uncle Fu who seems to dislike lemons intensely.
What would I do if life gave me lemons?
I wouldn't take them. I don't want lemons. Not really.
What would I do if life made me take lemons; just handed them to me and ran away?
I'd just stand there awkwardly with lemons in my hand for a bit. Then put them on my table and forget about them. And they'd stay there for a while until they go all brown and rot and start to smell. Then I'd throw them away. I really don't want lemons.
I really really want boobs. Not for myself - as in, I don't want to have boobs on me. I just want them.
On a person.
Life should give me a person with boobs. Preferably a person who won't mind if they see the shallow useless side of me. The side that chooses to let lemons rot and not make lemonade. So what I really want from life are boobs. Not lemons.